you did not act your talk..u barely talk only! you stand for your opinion firmly, unwillingly to accept others' opinions you assume that everything that favour to you , it's a must to be followed you reject others'opinions with that annoyed expression you barely made time to check other's feeling about your own opinion despite of what others always did for you you talk rubbish, something,,(sorry, this is quite harsh) know-it-all , subjugating others' interests while others supporting or agreeing with yours, that's unfair~ please listen to others as well, don't judge other's opinions and criticise them indirectly, because..it's so hurtful in a way!

( pictures courtesy of tumblr n cik google..)
true indeed..:)

that ''down'' part :(

Each time people talk about love, i would feel the isolation. Is it because of my feeling only or was it i'm the only one who feel that way? Those questions wander around my mind. Who am i to be loved? At certain extent, i feel like i'm not deserved to be love. Was it because I’m lack of my self -esteem ? Even to the critical point when i could not find any great things about me to be proud of. What is exactly that I supposed do..I mean for me to rebuild my confidence that i used to have before,

the confidence of expressing my views, my feelings and also the strength of standing up in front of audiences and giving talks in spontaneous act. Where is it gone? Those strength and confidence?

How I wish I can return back to my childhood memories .There is no worries at all, I suppose. Hanging out and having fun with my friends. How I miss those time so much. I do not feel the loss of my loved ones as I’ve never experienced it before. But, as time goes by, I’ve experienced the loss and I mean it, it’s the biggest loss ever for me. That’s the turning point for me that shaped who am I today. I think those loss and failure make me become a different person. However, I’m not sure whether the changes have brought the positive or negative sides of me.

Losing someone that you think will always be at ur sides during ur ups and down do give bigger impacts to your daily routines. As for me, I’m becoming more aware, alert and sometimes to the extent that I’ve been paranoid, especially getting surprise calls from the family or even the midnight calls as the bad news maybe at the end of the line.

The beginning of my coming age of 20, I’ve encountered with lots of trials and sorrow. Happiness may not be at my side. Losing both of my dearest grandparents , that used to be with me during my struggles, their presence make me stronger whenever there is no one else that understand my feeling, during that ‘’down’’ moment, leave deep impact to me. Whenever someone else talks about them, after the loss, I cannot deal with that sadness, holding back my tears is such a painful parts for me.

ABSOLUTELY TRUE !
that's what i trying to do along these whole years..

if i'm still been attached to those old moments and stories..i won't change i suppose..
but i won't lose hope ...make little changes day by days..:)

2012 :)

~ IT's 2012 already ~

of course ..it's new year already ..everyone must be busy updating the status of their new year' resolutions..but how many have fulfilled last year's resolutions? put ur hands up in the air ..and i'm the first who'll be joining u as well..hehe...it's so typical i think..new year comes n new resolution..but who cares..at least we have set up some goals right..in order to assemble all sort of things that'll be coming out to us in this year..so now worries..at least u have goals to be seen as right..

but of course..keep on praying for this year's plans and resolutions will be going on smoothly..works harder no regrets!

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” -Maria Robinson-




before that..i've read through few articles on web..i found this ..n i forgot the link actually..:( btw..it's such a good beginning to be started with..for the new year..

Stop trying to hold onto the past. – You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.

Stop being scared to make a mistake. – Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing. Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success. You end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.

Stop berating yourself for old mistakes. – We may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us. We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your

Up & Down

we tend to easily take things for granted .once we lose those valuable and precious things..there you go..weeping like there's no tomorrow. that's what i have experienced before and of course no matter how hard you try, those 'll never come back to you..

it's not necessary to be those ''lovey-dovey thing what-so-ever-u-called-it'' , they can be those litte, tiny events or people who always around you, but then..in a blink..they are no longer there for you..to accompany your days, to cheer u up..to weep your tears and to give laughters ..

these few years back, i have experienced lots of loss..of course..all happens for reasons and who are we to avoid from Allah's will.

and recently, i have lost my uncle in an accident. It's such a shock to us, our family and the rest. i still can recall vividly what happen on that tragic day. i just cannot bear to see my cousins and beloved aunt's condition. it was a long day for me, to avoid myself from weeping but to see how strong my aunt was, i gained my strength as well. HOWever, i;m very relieved as i;m able to help my aunt to ease her feeling and try to do things for her. i;m blessed to be at her side and helpin to arrange few things on that day.

losing is part and parcel of lives right?..but to what extent you can cope with the loss..it does matter..

may this new year promises us , the whole big family, a better future,loves and care towards each of us. May Allah give bless on us..aminn..:)

super cool !

Still I Rise


You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Maya Angelou



~ credit to mr google >> i've found this cool poem..no matter how much people have looked down on your ability..face it with confidence and the rest'll come to you !

~ reminiscing the memories ~

post kali ini..urmm..ape erk...sye mmg clueless nk post ape..tp pikir2...hmm..let's walk down the memory lane...hehe...okeh...aku mmg ske mengenang benda2 lme..memori lame esp..tp kalo bab menghafal..x terer plak..ish2...

honestly..kenangan mmg byk yng indah...tp pahit pon byk jgk...bile sebut psal memory ..mmg x lari nk citer pasal..kenangan2 yg ble aku ingat blk..buat aku sengih2 sorang..hihikk..gila la sket kdg2..emo pon ade gak...


tp..kalo kenangan tue mmebuatkan kiter rse stuck utk truskan hari2 ke hadapan..it's better not to be remembered..i;m not being sceptical or what...but that's the best way to escape from the old memories to haunt u..and make u feel down...

i have experienced it...the moment i kept thinking and remember about that bitter memories..i would easily felt so down...so i thought...it is better for me to erase it from my permanent storage..so i will able to lead my days forward in a better ways!